Thinking....

I have been doing a lot of reading lately, which has lead to a lot of thinking...dangerous, I know.  Some of my reading has included various blog posts and articles about, essentially, the idea of "checking out".  Maybe checking out is the wrong turn of phrase.  Maybe it would be more accurate to describe it as gradually lowering standards of participation over the course of a certain time period; for instance, over the course of a school year.  This idea of having a metaphorical finish line to cross and slowly divesting yourself of responsibilities associated with the race you are running got me thinking about a lot of things, but, particularly regarding the ideas that I put out into the ether via this blog.  My writing style could be construed as having a negative (I like to call it sarcastic) bent and it occurred to me that, anyone who reads this and who does not know me personally may be left with an unsavory (food pun alert!) impression of me.

I don't honestly remember the details of everything that I have ever written, but as a whole, this blog has been about feeding my family in the most nutritious, cost-effective way possible while attempting to expand their food tolerances and preferences.  Some of my posts have covered the nights where I stumble, specifically lowering my own food-related standards because life has just completely gotten in my way that day.  I think though, that what I want my readers to take away from this post, is that I know I have extremely high standards especially when it comes to food, but I do find myself making compromises, on very specific things, from time to time.  I am human, after all, and I do these things to maintain my sanity, primarily as a mother, but also as a professionally trained chef.  However, like most things in life and particularly in regards to parenting, I look at the idea of feeding my family as a marathon rather than a sprint.  The race that I run, in the long term, will be one of healthy cooking at home because that is what my biggest priority is as far as feeding my family goes.  Even though I stumble (and I tend to often), I enjoy my very brief respite and, in my case, I get back into the kitchen to cook something delicious and nourishing for my family. 

Though I am a professionally trained chef, I also have the immense privilege and responsibility of being the primary caregiver for my three children, and I feel that, based on my own education and the knowledge I have acquired, I do not have the right to check out, long-term, of something as fundamental as feeding my family on a daily basis. I know so many people who struggle with this specific part of everyday life; cooking does not come naturally to everyone.  I find no fault with the struggle nor with alternative choices (eating out or other faster/easier solutions) that another person may make for their families.  I certainly find no fault with the short term breaks we allot ourselves from the frenetic pace of our routine, daily lives.  That being said though, as a parent, I also feel that I do not have the right to check out, long-term, of many, many other priorities that I have set for my family's lives: their literacy, their education, raising them to be productive and contributing members of society...the list goes on.  I know we all have our moments of weakness and I know that I certainly do, in cooking and in life, but I dislike the idea of congratulating myself for allowing, as I said before, a divestment of the various responsibilities associated with my life commitments.  All of that being said, different people have different priorities and, as I am finding more and more frequently, those priorities do not overlap with mine, which is totally fine.  I've just been thinking is all....again, dangerous, I know.